Yup! Today we’re going to make Poop Peeps. Marshmallow Peeps that are shaped like the poop emoji.
You all know marshmallow peeps, right? They are the candy corn of Easter candy. Some people hate em, some people love em. I for one love them. They are crunchy on the outside and soft and fluffy on the inside. How could that be a bad thing?! So marshmallow peeps are pretty much marshmallows coated in dyed sugar crystals. If you think about how simple that sentence is you will realize that it’s also super simple to make at home. All you need is sugar, gelatin, and food dye. So, without further adoodoo, let’s get poopin!
Takin’ the Browns to the Super Bowl
The first thing we need to try and replicate the poop emoji is a brown sugar. Well not brown sugar, but brown dyed sugar. Granulated, white sugar has been refined into little pourable crystals that we use in our coffee or everyday cooking. Brown sugar, however, is granulated sugar with molasses added in. This gives the sugar a nice caramel, nutty flavor but also leads to the sugar forming moist clumps. These clumps can also dry out leaving hard rocks. We need sugar we can sprinkle, so we must dye the white sugar brown. To do this we need, you guessed it, brown food dye.
I went with the liquid food dye from Lorann Oils. To dye the sugar pour 1 cup of sugar into a Ziploc bag and then add the dye in drops. The problem is, that you are going to need a lot of drops to get the deep brown color of a turd. It took 125 drops to achieve this and I’m not sure what that is in teaspoons. If anyone tries this and measures it out please tell me in the comments and I’ll update the instructions. After you’ve added the dye, you will have 1 large dark clump in white. Just fully seal the baggie and massage it until the dye spreads throughout. It should only take a couple of minutes. Just make sure you break up the clumps so the dye spreads evenly.
You Should Have Something That Looks Like This
Next, pour the brown dyed sugar through a coarse sieve to sift out the large clumps into a baking a sheet. We will be using this pan as a working surface. Discard the clumps from the strainer and shake the baking sheet to get a thin layer. Let it air dry for about 10 minutes. Last but not least, we need to add a little flavor to these poops. I did this by, first, pouring the sugar into a mason jar. To do this without making a mess, I simply made a cone out of printer paper and used it as a funnel. Lastly, we need to add some flavor, and instead of making it taste like something that came out of your chocolate starfish, we’re just going to make it chocolate. So add a 1/2 tablespoon of cocoa powder and shake it up.
Exactly Like This
Pour it back out into the baking sheet and shake it a bit to form an even layer.
Now it’s time to make some marshmallow! It’s surprisingly easy you just need a few things. We need a Kitchen Aid Stand Mixer with the whisk attachment. We also need powdered gelatin, vanilla extract, candy thermometer, and a piping bag fitted with a 1/2 inch (Ateco #12) tip. Step 1 is the activate the gelatin. Pour a 1/3 of a cup of water into the mixing bowl and then pour the contents of 1 gelatin packet on top. Let it sit for 10 minutes. While the gelatin is…um…gelling, add 1 cup of sugar and 1/4 cup of water to a small sauce pan. Clip your candy thermometer to the side and bring to a gentle boil over medium heat. The mixture is ready when it reads about 235ºF (~113ºC). This should take about 10 minutes so the timing is perfect. Pour the mixture into the stand mixer bowl and give it a gentle stir with a spoon to break up any leftover gelatin clumps. Add the vanilla extract and turn on the mixer at medium-high speed, and whisk until super fluffy (9 minutes).
Immediately, using a silicone spatula, transfer the mixture to your piping bag.
Kicking Out The Kardashians
Alright, we’re ready to pipe some poop! Twist the end of your piping bag shut and break out your baking sheet lined with brown dyed sugar. Pipe out the marshmallow directly into the sugar making 2 inch diameter, tightly coiled piles of dookie. Remember you don’t have to squeeze too hard, but you do need to concentrate to get a beautiful BM. However, if your Texas Turds are not holding their shape and looking more like runny Mississippi Mud, wait a minute and let the marshmallow cool a bit. A “Pile of Poo” emoji has 4 levels, so keep that in mind when piping. Repeat until the piping bag is empty. You should have about 15 to 20 poop peeps.
While they are still tacky, just pick up the brown dyed sugar with your fingers and dump it on top. Once there is a light coating, you can even pick it up an dredge it gently in the sugar, or you could keep sprinkling. The dredging was most effective though.
You should have nice little poops like this 💩
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Firing A Trump
OK, we got our poops made! Now comes the part where we put on the eyes and mouth. What I did was cut slices of mini marshmallows for the whites of the eyes. Dab your finger in small bowl of water and moisten the sticky side. Press down a bit and it should be tacky enough to stick onto the poop. For the mouth, cut the mini marshmallow in half longways and then cut that in half so that it makes s semi circle. Repeat the process and affix the smile to the poop. Last but not least, the pupils! So what I did here was dropped a little brown food dye into a teaspoon measure. I then took a toothpick and dipped it a little into the brown liquid and carefully dotted in the pupils.
There ya have it! Everything you need to start pinching your own marshmallow loaves.
Update: So reader Kristin hit me with some science and gave me the teaspoon measurement for how much dye we need!
Usually 20 drops=1ml and 5ml’s=1tsp so 100 drops should be roughly 1 tsp.
So basically we need 1 1/2 teaspoons of dye! Thanks, internet!
- 1 Cup Granulated Sugar
- 1 1/2 Teaspoons Brown Food Dye (150 Drops)
- 1/2 Tablespoon Cocoa Powder
- 1 Packet Powdered Gelatin
- 1/3 Cup Water
- 1 Cup Sugar
- 1/4 Cup Water
- 1 Teaspoon Vanilla Extract
- About 40 Mini Marshmallow
- Small Bowl of water
- 1/4 Teaspoon Brown Food Dye
- Fill a Ziploc bag with sugar and drop 150 drops of brown food dye into it. Seal the bag, and massage it to mix the food coloring well. If there are clumps, break up them up with your thumbs. It should take about 5 minutes to fully incorporate.
- Sift the contents of the bag into a baking sheet and let it air dry for about 10 minutes.
- Transfer the brown dyed sugar to a mason jar, add the cocoa powder, seal it, and shake vigorously until well combined.
- Pour it back into the baking sheet and shake a bit to spread evenly.
- Affix a whisk attachment to a stand mixer and fill the bowl with 1/3 cup of water. Sprinkle one packet of powdered gelatin on top and let sit for 10 minutes.
- While the gelatin mixes with the water. Pour 1 cup of sugar and 1/4 cup of water into a medium saucepan. Clip a candy thermometer to the side of the pot and turn the heat to medium. Cook until the sugar is dissolved and the temperature reaches approximately 235ºF.
- Add the contents of the pot to the mixing bowl and gently stir to break up any lumps of gelatin.
- Add the vanilla extract and turn the mixer on to medium-high speed (speed 7) and whisk until light and fluffy (About 9 minutes).
- Using a silicone spatula transfer the marshmallow to a piping bag fitted with a half inch diameter tip.
- Pipe the marshmallow directly into the sugar mixture. Make a 2 inch diameter base and then swirl it upwards to resemble tightly coiled piles of poop. Keep in mind that a poop emoji has 4 levels to it so try and aim for that many. If the mixture isn't holding its shape, let the marshmallow cool for a minute and then continue piping.
- While still tacky, dust the poops with the brown dyed sugar. If there is a even a bit of a coating you can pick up the marshmallow and gently dredge it in the sugar. They should hold their shape.
- Cut slices of mini-marshmallows with a knife. Dab your finger into a bowl of water and moisten the tacky side. Press down firmly to flatten it out a bit. Next affix the eyes to the poo pile. Do the same with the mouth but instead of slicing, cut the mini-marshmallow lengthwise and then cut a semi-circle out of that. Moisten and affix.
- Make the pupils by lightly dotting brown food dye onto the eyes with a toothpick.